I have been attending an anxiety management course in the hospital. The course is run by a fabulous nurse. She has been great, proffessional, compassionate, helpful and she also happens to have a cracking sense of humour. One suggestion she made for coping with anxiety is to distract yourself by making lists. For example dream dinner party.

I have found this tool very useful. So this weekend she suggested I make lists of things people shouldn’t say. So I bring you “Things A … Shouldn’t Say”

Things a pilot should never say ..

“Our inboard refreshment trolley includes a wide range of alcoholic drinks, the quality of which I can personally vouch for, hic”

“This is the first time I’ve ever flown a real plane, woohoo”

Things a parent should never say….

“I’m not a big fan of children”

“I find brandy to be a fantastic sleep aid, keeps the kids asleep for hours”

“What time does school end again (at 10pm)”

Things a surgeon should never say ..


“Has anyone seen my scalpel ?”

Things a trapeze artist should never say …

“Look no hands!”

Things  David Cameron shouldn’t say…

Opens mouth “…”

With that I open it up to you my readers. Make me laugh , with things a … should never say.