As usual this morning I woke up and spent a moment checking my twitter feed. I tweeted “The sun is shining and life is good”. So I suppose you could say that I asked for what happened next. That I requested a downgrade on my day by being a little bit too pleased with my life and coming off as smug.
Next I’m in the kitchen and Super Kid wanders in scratching his head. “Mummy my head is itchy” he tells me. I bend over him to take a look and am greeted by a large wingless insect lounging on a deckchair, reading The Guardian. Ok so it wasn’t on a deckchair, but if head lice had a paper of choice I’m pretty sure The Guardian would be the only one liberal enough to accept their readership.
Inside I panic. I’m not great with creepy crawlies at the best of times. Creepy crawlies that are living on my son’s head, drinking his blood and setting up home on his scalp properly freak me out!
However I’m a good enough parent not to follow my instinct and shout to Purpledad “DARLIN SUPER KID HAS NITS, alert the authorities and grab contamination suits and napalm immediately”. Instead, I calmly tell Super Kid not to worry, grab my iPad and tweet about my predicament. I get scores of replies very quickly with answers ranging from ‘keep calm and use a nit comb’ to ‘get all the chemicals you can muster and attack the little blighters’.
Then I spy out of the corner of my eye the electric shaver that I use on my husband for his two monthly shearing. ‘Do I shave my son’s head?’ I tweet. Unfortunately before awaiting a response, and obviously with my son’s approval I make a snap decision and give him a grade four. Then I turn back to twitter where I am greeted by a collective ‘noooo’.
Ah well, his hair looks fine and there are definitely now less nits, I decide. I take him to school and head to the chemist to stock up ready for the lice war on his return. I grab nit combs, and a product called Hedrin which apparently suffocates the lice. Seems kind of mean but it’s a war, and war can be cruel.
Following the nit combs instruction leaflet I comb the whole family. Lucky me I find lice on both other children (though not so many) and Purpledad finds a couple on me. He has escaped because of his thick hair and unpalatable blood (the blood part is not true but it makes me feel better). So Robo Boy gets a grade four too. Wonder Girl escapes with a thorough nit combing. We all cover our heads in Hedrin.
As I type I am sat with my greasy headrin covered head dripping nit napalm onto my pyjama top. I get to repeat the whole experience in a week to ensure that newly hatched eggs get zapped also. Despite this, and despite the tiny wingless creatures who have dominated my day I will stand by my earlier tweet, life is good.
I had this Monday evening… husband decides to tell me that the kids had received a note from school on FRIDAY warning that nits were doing the rounds. Thanks Mr G. We had his family staying from Friday night, lots of cuddles for the kids as they hadn’t seen their auntie and uncle since October… so we had to make the humiliating phone call to warn them. Older three were clear, youngest was itching away and I found loads of unhatched eggs but no nasties, I assume it laid and hopped off to someone else. Hubby wanted to shave his head but he wouldn’t let us, as apparently he’s just perfected the ‘geek sweep’ on his fringe with gel (he’s 6…?) Subsequently I’ve spent the last two days itching just at the thought of the buggers.
Oh – love ‘nit napalm’ haha. I can’t use nit stuff as it makes my kids swell and look like they’ve been in the ring with Tyson Fury, so I have one of those combs that you don’t need to use any shampoo with. It was pricey but in the long run a lot cheaper I guess. Good luck with round 2!
Urgh, horrid things aren’t they. Have to say though I love the idea of a geek sweep!
Just reading this made my head itch! Arghhh! Once you have the all clear though, the best tip I was ever given though was to use teatree shampoo and conditioner on the kids hair. Apparently nits don’t like the smell of teatree and conditioner also makes it hard for them to hang on to your follicles *shudder* I know it sounds too simple to be true but it really works. We always escape outbreaks!
Good tip, have already stocked up tea tree leave on conditioner, that’ll teach the little critters.
Oh we’ve had a constant fight with them – the only thing which helped in the end for us was tea tree stuff (from Poundland) and a Nitty Gritty comb (which got rid of the really little ones) – good luck!
Thanks for the tips.
ok I get the message. Take care, be happy.
I can’t see how pls unsubscribe me. not much point following you if my replies are more often than not ignored.
Fay, what’s happened? I’m not sure why you feel this way but I can assure you I would not deliberately ignore you. You are one of my most long term readers and it would be a shame to lose you. Perhaps a comment has slipped past my radar. I have three small children, and a number of health issues and sometimes I don’t manage to rely to everyone. I do try my best.