September aspirations

September is well and truly started, the boys are back at school and WG starts her settling in sessions in reception class next week. She’ll be in school full time by the end of the month. Things are a little unsettled round here as her schedule is patchy with some days at school and some off for the next three weeks. I’m not a big fan of unsettled, changing routine but I’m trying to roll with it. So here are my September aspirations.

It’s a time of big change for me. After eight and a half years of full time parenting I will be alone for six hours a day during the week. Moving into this new stage of life is a challenge, I’ll miss having a little one at home, plus I’m not good with change. However she’s ready and I feel confident that she will enjoy school, so that makes me happy.

So it’s a good time to look at my aspirations for this month, and generally, as I move into this new stage.

I plan on resting more. Initially I had thought that once the children were all at school I would be dashing around, staying on top of domestic stuff and filling remaining time with fulfilling, constructive activities.

However with CFS draining my energy and autism causing regular feelings of overload I need to rethink. So in order to enjoy my family more I’m actually planning on doing less during the school day. Resting to have the energy to manage my family time better after school and at the weekends.

I’m not someone who is naturally good at being alone. So my challenge is to settle into this way of living. I have colouring in books, writing challenges, a new digital radio and a very comfortable sofa (purple of course). I would like to learn to enjoy this enforced slower pace, and try very hard not to feel crappy about my lack of career. Life has dealt me this hand so I’d like to be grateful for what I do have and embrace it.

I also want to use this opportunity to focus on my writing. I’m feeling good about my blog, I’m being true to myself and enjoying writing again as a result. I want to keep going with this flow. I also plan on writing a book about aspects of my life as an autistic woman, so I’d like to get started with that now I have a little more free time.

September brings time in my lovely home, being appreciative of the things in my life and trying not to overthink the rest. Yesterday someone told me that life cannot all be enjoyable, so we manage the hard feelings and make the most of the good ones. This really resonated with me, so it’s the thought I’m carrying with me this month as I wave goodbye to my baby girl at school. As my children get older things change, but I will always be their Mum.